Eileen just sent me this e-mail:

> > WHAT I HAVE LEARNED AS I MATURED

> > I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

> > I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.

> > I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

> > I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have a big weenie or huge boobs.

> > I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.

> > I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.

> > I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

> > I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.

> > I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

So true...

And I just sent this to her: (found it on someone's journal)

HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN
Compliment her,
respect her,
honor her,
cuddle her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
stroke her,
tease her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hug her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine and dine her,
buy things for her,
listen to her,
care for her,
stand by her,
support her,
hold her,
go to the ends of the Earth for her.

HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN
Show up naked.
Bring food.