Hey if anyone out there wants to help me guarantee a Raiders victory on Sunday, please email me... we need to get Dante a Tampa Bay jersey, just for this week... whatever team he roots for always turn out to be losers, except for the Lakers last season but thats catching up to us now. Sorry Bruins... it was my fault for turning him into a UCLA fan and look what its cost us... one major head coach fired and another one on his way to being fired. And just ask Mike and Steve what Dante did to the Broncos :).

I can't believe this whole office of 20 people, about 10 male and 10 female, only Eileen and I are the diehard football fans... Where are all the manly men??? Good thing we both root for the Raiders too, it creates a little harmony in our little office we share. I'm still amazed at how well we get along.

I'm getting off topic now but my new roommate has been pissing me off all week because she cooks a lot and leaves the mess. Dante and I decided to be nice and clean it up cause we wanted to cook... she didn't even say thanks and the next morning, there was another mess! I took a sick day yesterday and it just bothered me a lot that the mess was there all day. She didn't do anything all day!!! She was just in her room the entire day, except when she came out to get lunch and cook dinner. 2 weeks ago, the day after I spent $150 on groceries for me and Dante, I go to the fridge and 4 of my eggs were gone... I asked Dante if he ate them even though I knew he was too lazy to do anything with eggs (requires a little effort) and he said no... I know 4 eggs is no big deal but its not the first time its happened before... I think it pisses me off so much because I am the one who goes to work from 9am to 6pm M-F and sometimes even 9am to about 10:30pm when I work at Jay's and if I go back to the apartment for lunch, she's there. When I get home at 6pm, she's there. If I get back home at 10:30pm she's there!! I don't want to be working my ass off to support her because its not my job!! I support Dante sometimes because I want to, because we have a relationship. I didn't mind doing anything for Eileen because she was a friend and she always had my back when I needed help. But this stranger that I'm living with?? I'm already pissed off that I'm the only person who seems to know that you have to take the trash out to the dumpster - it doesn't automatically end up there!!

Oops, went off on a long tangent... Anyway, GO RAIDERS!

I went to the mall for lunch today instead of going back to the apartment... Went to Victoria's Secret and there's nothing better than panties shopping to cheer a person up! :) I don't even know why I'm depressed... I'm used to the Lakers winning the championship but its been 19 years since the Raiders even got to the Super Bowl so I should be happy... I think it might be because I was watching American Idol last night and during the "catching up with last year's stars" show, all these people have their dreams coming true. I don't even know for sure what I want to do yet. I'll probably start studying for the LSATs though... need some direction in my life!!

If you have the time and energy, read this journal entry by Lori from Real World Back to New York... its called Real Life and I totally feel everything she's saying. Her first paragraph just got me thinking a lot... My mother said that she feels so bad for me and my sisters because we are the first generation who will earn less than our parents. The economy had been on an upswing, but it climaxed, and now we're on the way down. It hit me hard when she said that. I always believed I'd be able to give my own family what my parents gave us. I thought I'd be able to give them more because I thought life worked out that way. The idea that I could be wrong spiraled me into a thousand new thoughts about life, and I'm not too happy with these discoveries. The real world is scary and depressing. I should have listened to the advice everyone at my old job gave me when I first started working during my junior year of college... STAY IN SCHOOL AS LONG AS YOU CAN!! She goes on to talk about how its hard living off herself now, without her parent's help and I'm totally going through the same thing. My parents would help me, but I don't want them to. I need to make it on my own. Then, Lori quotes her sister and this statement is SO TRUE! "Well, just because you have a job doesn't mean you know what you want to do. Most people who are working don't think that's where they want to be forever. They don't know what they want to do with their lives either, they're just working a job until they do know." So many people are doing their job because it's a job�it's what they can do to make money, but that's not what they want to do. They don't love it, they just do it. They can't leave it to find what they love because they need the money, they need the benefits, and they don't know what they would love to do anyway. Now, they don't even have the time or the wherewithal to try and figure it out. They're too busy doing their current job, and too tired when they get home. I can go on and on but its probably just easier if you read her entry. It just depressed me just like the way watching Ally McBeal used to depress me. I don't even know if I want to keep doing business management because like Jay told me, "if you decide to go down this path, you need to become a business manager and have clients of your own." I think I want to go to law school because of my previous experience in law, but what if I come out and I decide this isn't for me?? Thats 3 years and about $100,000.00 wasted! Damn, I'm depressed again... might have to go do some more panties shopping.